“You may’t calm the storm, so cease making an attempt. What you are able to do is calm your self. The storm will move.” ~Timber Hawkeye
Overwhelm doesn’t all the time knock politely. Typically it crashes into my day like an surprising storm—abruptly I can’t suppose straight, and every part feels pressing, unattainable, and too loud. One minute I’m nice, the subsequent I’m spiraling in my head, satisfied I’m falling behind on every part and failing everybody.
In the event you’ve ever sat frozen in your automotive within the grocery retailer car parking zone, staring blankly at a to-do checklist that now looks like a private assault, you’re not alone.
Listed here are six issues I flip to after I really feel utterly overwhelmed—none of them repair every part, however all of them assist me discover my footing once more.
1. I cease making an attempt to “determine all of it out” proper now.
Once I’m overwhelmed, my mind turns right into a malfunctioning pc with eighty-seven tabs open and nothing loading. I instantly attempt to remedy every part without delay, like I can outthink the chaos if I simply attempt arduous sufficient.
However considering more durable doesn’t repair it. It simply fries my system.
I’ve realized to pause and remind myself: I don’t want to repair my entire life on this precise second. Once I really feel myself spiraling into “repair all of the issues” mode (shoutout to ADHD), I write down no matter I’m making an attempt to recollect or management. That approach I’m not ignoring it—I’m simply parking it someplace so I can get by the factor I truly must do proper now.
2. I choose one tiny factor I can do.
Typically I stare on the mountain and overlook I can simply take one step. My mind instantly goes into “do all of it proper now otherwise you’re failing” mode. And that’s after I find yourself doing completely nothing besides overthinking and hating myself for not being productive.
So I cease and ask: What’s the subsequent five-minute job I can do with out utilizing my final mind cell?
Not the entire kitchen—simply get the dishes out of the sink. Not the entire inbox—simply reply to the one electronic mail that’s been haunting me for days. One drawer. One telephone name. One invoice.
It doesn’t really feel glamorous, however it’s how I trick my mind into movement. As a result of 5 minutes of motion beats two hours of beating myself up for not doing something. Tiny progress remains to be progress. And typically, it’s the one variety that’s obtainable.
3. I floor myself in one thing sensory.
When anxiousness hits, it’s like my mind hijacks my entire physique. Immediately, I’m not simply pressured and overwhelmed. No quantity of logic works in that second as a result of my nervous system doesn’t care that every part’s technically nice.
So as a substitute of making an attempt to suppose my approach out of it (which by no means works), I shift focus to something bodily. I take a cool bathe, drink a chilly glass of water, mild a candle, or placed on my favourite scented lotion. I’ve held ice cubes earlier than simply to shock my mind again into my physique.
Typically I simply sit with my cat and deal with the texture of his fur below my hand, like, “Okay, that is actual. That is right here. I’m not being chased by a bear.”
Sensory grounding truly helps. It’s not deep or profound, however it’s fundamental anxiousness aid. And truthfully, that’s the vibe I’m going for after I’m spiraling: survive first, analyze later.
4. I do a ten-minute reset (phone-free).
I set a timer and do one thing quiet and easy—no telephone, no information, no notifications. Simply ten minutes with out enter. That alone looks like a luxurious.
I sit exterior and zone out to regardless of the wind is doing. Or I colour like a bored kindergartener. Typically I wash the dishes actually slowly, like I’m doing a meditative artwork kind as a substitute of fundamental hygiene. And infrequently, I simply lie on the ground and stare on the ceiling like I’m rebooting my total existence.
It’s not about being productive or utilizing the time nicely. It’s about giving my mind a break from having to be on on a regular basis. Ten minutes of stillness doesn’t repair every part, however it provides me simply sufficient house to breathe once more—and typically, that’s all I must preserve going.
5. I examine my self-talk for cruelty.
Overwhelm brings out absolutely the worst interior dialogue. My mind turns right into a imply woman with a megaphone. She says issues like:
“Why can’t you deal with this?”
“You’re behind—once more.”
“Everybody else is doing simply nice. What’s your excuse?”
It’s not useful. It’s simply self-bullying, dressed up as motivation.
Once I catch that voice spiraling, I attempt to pause and reply the best way I might if a pal got here to me in the identical state—exhausted, anxious, and making an attempt their greatest. I’d by no means say, “Wow, you’re actually unhealthy at life.” I’d say one thing like:
You’re not failing. You’re overwhelmed. Let’s determine what would truly assist proper now.
That shift—from disgrace to assist, from blame to curiosity—adjustments every part. It doesn’t magically make the stress disappear, however it retains me from mentally kicking myself whereas I’m already down. And truthfully, that’s a win.
6. I let or not it’s a “low energy mode” day.
Telephones go into low energy mode after they’re drained—and so do I. And on these days, I cease anticipating myself to operate like I’m absolutely charged.
I do the naked minimal. I eat one thing easy (no matter takes zero mind energy and possibly is available in a wrapper). I put on the comfiest garments I can discover, even when they don’t match and have questionable stains. I don’t pressure motivation to indicate up or attempt to “push by.” I let or not it’s sufficient that I exist and made it away from bed.
And I cease treating relaxation like one thing I need to earn. I don’t must examine off 5 duties or show I’m productive earlier than I’m allowed to take a breath. Typically, probably the most accountable factor I can do is shut every part down and reboot.
As a result of being human is difficult. Being delicate, overstimulated, exhausted, or simply completed is a part of it. And it’s okay to have days after I’m not okay. I don’t have to elucidate or justify it. Low energy mode remains to be functioning—it simply means I’m defending my power till I’ve sufficient to indicate up absolutely once more.
Remaining Ideas
Overwhelm doesn’t imply I’m damaged. It often means I’ve been working on empty for too lengthy whereas making an attempt to carry every part collectively with out sufficient relaxation, assist, or room to crumble safely. It’s not weak spot. It’s a warning mild.
These six issues don’t magically repair the mess. They’re not a makeover or a glow-up. They’re a ladder. A mild, scrappy, wobbly little ladder I’ve constructed over time that helps me climb out of the psychological spiral one small rung at a time.
In the event you’re feeling buried proper now—below expectations, feelings, obligations, or simply life normally—I hope one thing on this checklist reminds you:
You don’t should do all of it. You don’t should be productive to be worthy. You don’t should carry out your ache or show how arduous issues are.
You simply have to come back again to your self. One breath. One step. One tiny act of care at a time.
You’ve obtained this. And even when right this moment, this simply means brushing your tooth, replying to at least one textual content, or microwaving some unhappy leftovers—that also counts.
You continue to depend.
About Melissa McNamara
Melissa McNamara, the creator of Joyful Simpler, is devoted to displaying that happiness is attainable for everybody. Her weblog shares sensible, fact-based suggestions and strategies for main a more healthy and extra fulfilling life. As a nurse practitioner, Melissa combines her healthcare experience with clear, actionable recommendation. Regardless of early challenges, she turned difficulties into alternatives for development, and thru Joyful Simpler, she offers instruments to assist others obtain lasting happiness.
