“Try to not be successful, however reasonably to be of worth.” ~Albert Einstein, tailored
I typically really feel like I used to be born into the unsuitable story.
I grew up in a time when success meant one thing quieter. My father was a public college music trainer. We didn’t have a lot, however there was a dignity in how he carried himself. He believed in doing good work—not for recognition or wealth, however as a result of it mattered.
That perception formed me. I grew to become a trainer, filmmaker, and musician. And for many years, I’ve adopted an identical path: one rooted in that means, not cash.
However someplace alongside the best way, the story modified.
Throughout me—particularly in locations like Los Angeles, the place I’ve lived and labored—I see folks operating. Hustling. Branding. Monetizing. It’s not sufficient to be good anymore. It’s important to be seen. Promoted. Scaled. Life itself has change into one thing to market.
And in that shift, I’ve felt one thing sacred go lacking.
The False Promise
I’m not in opposition to success. I would like to have the ability to pay my payments, assist my household, and really feel valued. However the model of success we’re fed—fame, visibility, infinite productiveness—is a lie. It guarantees that means however typically delivers vacancy.
We’ve changed presence with efficiency. Care with clicks. Integrity with optimization. And the consequence? A society the place exhaustion is regular and sufficient is rarely sufficient.
Psychologists name it extrinsic motivation—doing one thing for a reward, like cash or applause. It’s not inherently unhealthy. However when it dominates our lives, we lose contact with intrinsic motivation: the enjoyment of doing one thing simply because it issues to us.
When the whole lot turns into a transaction, even pleasure begins to really feel like a product.
The Shortage Sport
Generally I really feel like we’re all scrambling for crumbs. Competing for consideration, purchasers, gigs, or algorithms. Everybody attempting to outlive, to be seen, to matter.
It’s primal—like a twisted model of the hunter-gatherer intuition. However the place historic people balanced competitors with group, we’ve saved the combat and misplaced the tribe.
Now, even collaboration typically feels strategic—a method to climb, to not join. “Networking” replaces friendship. “Partnerships” change into efficiency. We’re informed to “collaborate” so we will get forward—not as a result of it nourishes our souls.
That shortage mindset doesn’t simply form how we work. It distorts how we see ourselves. If another person is prospering, we really feel like we’re falling behind. If we’re not being seen, we begin to doubt our price.
This isn’t simply economics. It’s religious erosion.
Capitalism and What It Forgot
I’ve been serious about capitalism—not as a political slogan, however as a cultural story. Adam Smith imagined markets constructed on freedom and mutual profit. However right now’s model typically rewards extraction over contribution, efficiency over presence, and particular person achieve over shared good.
Even schooling and healthcare—issues meant to uplift—are judged by effectivity, progress, and return on funding. I’ve seen faculties reduce arts packages within the identify of knowledge. I’ve watched care change into content material.
And I’ve felt it in myself—this stress to show my worth with numbers, even when probably the most significant issues I do can’t be measured.
One other Means of Residing
I’ve frolicked filming in distant indigenous communities within the southern Philippines, the place life strikes at a distinct tempo. There, folks didn’t ask the best way to monetize their function. They lived it. Storytelling was educating. Planting was prayer. Caring for elders wasn’t a chore—it was an honor.
No person was branding themselves.
However even in these locations, that lifestyle is vanishing. International markets, smartphones, and social media have arrived. The youthful technology is pulled towards trendy success. And who can blame them? Visibility guarantees energy. However what’s quietly misplaced is the rootedness of belonging.
And it’s not simply them. It’s all of us.
Do We Must Disappear?
Generally folks say, “Should you don’t just like the rat race, go stay in a monastery.”
However I don’t need to disappear. I like music, dialog, cities, educating. I need to stay on the planet—not retreat from it.
So the true query turns into: Can we stay meaningfully inside this world, with out being consumed by it?
I consider we will. In reality, I feel we should.
There are folks in all places doing quiet, very important work: lecturers who by no means go viral, gardeners who share meals, coders who write open-source instruments, volunteers who present up with out posting about it. They aren’t trending—however they’re tending to one thing actual.
Selecting What’s Actual
I don’t have a method. I nonetheless fear about cash. I nonetheless surprise if what I do issues. However I preserve coming again to this:
I’d reasonably make one thing sincere that reaches ten folks than pretend one thing that reaches ten thousand.
I’d reasonably be current than polished. I’d reasonably care than compete.
Should you really feel this too—this ache, this fatigue, this quiet grief that one thing important is being misplaced—you’re not alone.
And also you’re not damaged. It’s possible you’ll be one of many ones who remembers.
Remembers what it feels wish to pay attention deeply. To offer with out scoring factors. To stay from the within out, not the skin in.
That remembering isn’t weak spot. It’s your compass. And even in a monetized world, it nonetheless factors you dwelling.
The Fact Beneath the Lie
Right here’s what I’ve realized: Success, as we’re taught to outline it, is a shifting goal. You possibly can chase it for many years and nonetheless really feel empty.
However that means—actual, soul-deep that means—is one thing we will return to at any second. It’s in how we love. How we present up. How we make others really feel. It’s within the work we do when nobody is watching.
We might not be capable to change the entire system. However we will inform a more true story.
One the place worth isn’t based mostly on efficiency. One the place success isn’t a end line. One the place we belong—not as a result of we’re spectacular, however as a result of we’re human.
That story remains to be potential. And it’s price telling.
About Tony Collins
Tony Collins is a documentary filmmaker, educator, and author whose work explores creativity, caregiving, and private progress. He’s the creator of: Home windows to the Sea—a shifting assortment of essays on love, loss, and presence. Artistic Scholarship—a information for educators and artists rethinking how artistic work is valued. Tony writes to mirror on what issues—and to assist others really feel much less alone.
