“I’ve discovered magnificence within the whimsically atypical.” ~Elissa Gregoire
The pervasive message of our time asserts that success is important in each side of life, be it schooling, profession, friendships, or relationships. Within the relentless pursuit of success, many people toil ceaselessly, ingrained with the idea that triumph is the gateway to happiness.
Rewind three many years to after I was ten, and the emphasis was on excelling at school. Household, academics, and even films emphasised the narrative that good grades equated to happiness.
The equation was easy: good grades led to a superb job, monetary stability, an amazing companion, and happiness. I clung to this system, apart from a quickly rebellious part in school when momentary enjoyable felt extra necessary than grades. Quickly sufficient, I recalibrated my focus.
Reflecting again, I want I may have suggested my youthful self that straight A’s don’t assure success or a direct stellar job however, extra importantly, a content material life.
I don’t harbor regrets about discovering this later; nonetheless, I might have spared myself pointless stress over a single B-, considering it signaled the demise of my promising future.
I secured a good job as a social employee in my skilled life. Whereas the monetary rewards had been modest, I used to be serving to folks, which I all the time wished to do.
I gained happiness from serving to folks, as evidenced by glowing yearly evaluations from my supervisors. But, the fact of working with adults grappling with psychological well being and substance abuse points challenged the standard markers of success. The transformation I envisioned for my purchasers didn’t materialize on a broad scale. Solely two purchasers graduated from excessive colleges and located jobs in my three years, a comparatively meager success charge by my grading requirements.
Following my transient interval as a social employee, I delved into my ardour for writing. This endeavor proved to be one of the disheartening skilled experiences. Rejections outnumbered any I had confronted beforehand.
Regardless of the setbacks, I stayed resilient, recognizing that success in writing usually hinges on chance and luck. I’m decided to not abandon my pursuit of writing as a result of I really feel assured that perseverance will ultimately tilt the percentages in my favor. It’s only a matter of time.
Whereas higher-ups could have expressed dissatisfaction, getting revealed drew reward. The dichotomy of rejection versus acceptance raises the query of whether or not one success outweighs quite a few failures. Does public recognition invalidate private setbacks?
Friendships thrived till my late thirties, however they underwent a shift after I moved to Indiana. Prior successes in sustaining a various group of buddies diminished, leaving me with acquaintances however no deep connections I craved. Whether or not because of the pandemic, my age, or the situation, I encountered my first failure in forming significant friendships.
Taking a look at all spheres of my life, I’ve walked a path of average success.
I’ve hovered between not excelling and never faltering massively, settling into a snug averageness. The stress to outperform these round me is all the time current, however I’ve realized the futility of unending comparability. Striving for greatness is admirable however invitations overwhelming stress and overwork.
Being okay with being common doesn’t imply I’m lazy or haven’t any targets. I do know some folks will all the time be higher than me, and a few will likely be much less expert. However attempting to be the perfect doesn’t must imply I’m all the time burdened.
In the end, my journey has been one in all navigating the center floor and avoiding extremes. I haven’t soared to nice heights, however I’ve discovered contentment in averageness. Whether or not it’s schooling, profession, friendships, or writing, pursuing excellence ought to coexist with accepting private authenticity and avoiding the entice of incessant comparability and overbearing expectations.
Opposite to societal conditioning, being common isn’t undesirable. The happiest folks usually reside on a regular basis lives, having fun with time with household and buddies with out always chasing fame or fortune.
Selecting a less complicated life as an alternative of continually competing has made me a lot happier.
There’s one thing extraordinary about simply being atypical and having peace of thoughts. Nevertheless it looks like everybody’s all the time pushing for “extra.” Why, when true happiness comes from appreciating what we now have and ignoring the stress to all the time try for one thing larger?
Is there ever a conclusion to the ceaseless pursuit of outperforming others? I don’t suppose so.
After 4 many years, I’ve develop into content material with who I’m and the place I stand. Now not entangled within the internet of comparability or the pursuit of outdoing others, I discover pleasure in merely current the place I’m.
I used to really feel like I needed to be higher than everybody else, however that stress is gone now. I’m rather more relaxed and at peace, one thing I by no means felt when always attempting to be the perfect. I’m proud of the place I’m now, and I’m having fun with studying about issues that curiosity me. I like this new feeling of calm and am grateful for the experiences that helped me lastly settle for myself. I’m lastly at a spot of real self-acceptance.
About Anjana Rajbhandary
Anjana Rajbhandary is an Ayurvedic Well being Instructor and Licensed Psychological Well being Skilled with a ardour for holistic wellness. When she’s not writing or educating, yow will discover her exploring new cultures, having fun with reside music, or spending high quality time along with her beloved rescue pet, Sloane. Go to her at anjyrajy.com, on Medium, and on Instagram.
