“You could encounter many defeats, however you will need to not be defeated. In reality, it could be essential to encounter the defeats, so you’ll be able to know who you might be.” ~Maya Angelou
There was a time in my life when every part felt heavy, like I used to be continuously carrying round a weight that nobody else might see.
I wasn’t in a disaster, precisely. I used to be functioning, exhibiting up, doing what wanted to be accomplished. However inside, I used to be struggling to remain afloat—trapped in my very own head, questioning my price, and not sure easy methods to transfer ahead.
One night, I walked right into a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu class for the primary time. I had no concept what I used to be doing. I didn’t know the foundations, the language, and even easy methods to tie the belt on my gi. However I used to be drawn to it—possibly as a result of I used to be determined for one thing to drag me out of my psychological spiral. I wanted construction. I wanted problem. I wanted escape.
What I didn’t anticipate was that BJJ would grow to be greater than a bodily outlet. It turned a type of remedy. A spot the place I might reconnect with my physique when my thoughts felt like a battlefield.
Discovering Peace within the Stress
On the floor, BJJ seems to be intense—folks grappling, sweating, combating for management. However beneath, it’s a quiet recreation of survival. You breathe. You modify. You adapt. You retain going.
There have been moments once I could be pinned, utterly caught, with somebody twice my measurement on prime of me. I’d panic. My breath would quicken; my ideas would race. However then I’d hear my coach’s voice within the background: “Decelerate. You’re okay. Simply breathe.”
That easy instruction saved me greater than as soon as—not simply on the mat, however in life.
Over time, I began to note one thing: I used to be calmer exterior of coaching. Extra affected person. Extra conscious. Jiu-Jitsu didn’t repair my psychological well being in a single day, but it surely gave me instruments to take care of the times when every part felt like an excessive amount of.
Shedding It… and Discovering It Once more
After all, progress isn’t a straight line. After a couple of years of coaching, I obtained injured. Not as soon as—a number of occasions. Every harm pressured me to cease, relaxation, and reckon with the worry that possibly I wouldn’t return.
With out Jiu-Jitsu, I felt misplaced once more. That acquainted darkness crept again in, and I noticed how a lot I had come to depend on the apply to remain grounded. However finally, I returned. Slower, extra cautious, however extra appreciative than ever.
I noticed it wasn’t about being the very best or incomes stripes. It was about exhibiting up—for myself.
What I’ve Discovered
I used to assume therapeutic meant eliminating ache. Now I perceive it’s extra about studying to dwell with it—and studying easy methods to transfer with it, not in opposition to it.
Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu taught me resilience, sure. However extra importantly, it taught me presence. You may’t be caught in your head when somebody’s making an attempt to choke you out. You must be right here, now.
That apply of presence modified how I approached every part else—relationships, work, relaxation. It helped me grow to be somebody who doesn’t surrender so simply, even when issues get arduous.
Why I’m Sharing This
Possibly you’re not into martial arts. Possibly you’ve by no means set foot in a fitness center. That’s okay. This isn’t about Jiu-Jitsu—it’s about discovering the factor that brings you again to your self. That reminds you of your power while you’ve forgotten it.
It may very well be yoga, working, portray, journaling, climbing, music. It may very well be remedy. It doesn’t matter what it’s, so long as it helps you come house to your self.
In case you’re going by one thing proper now, I need you to know: You’re not weak for struggling. You’re not damaged. And also you’re not alone.
Discover your mat—no matter that appears like for you. And while you do, preserve exhibiting up. You may be shocked at how robust you already are.

About Robert Grover
Robert is a lifelong martial arts scholar and the founding father of Divine Jiu Jitsu, a small mission-driven model that helps psychological well being by group and attire. He trains BJJ in Scotland and believes within the energy of presence, strain, and exhibiting up when it’s arduous. Discover him on Instagram @Divine_jiujitsu or at divinejiujitsu.com.