It’s exhausting to know what to anticipate whenever you signal as much as hike 100 miles with a bunch of strangers you’ve by no means met. There are solely two ensures: the best way shall be stunning and the best way shall be exhausting.
This summer time, I’ll be trekking an extended stretch of the John Muir Path with a guided group from Wildland Trekking: Two weeks of alpine lakes, intense elevation achieve (primarily 300 flights of stairs per day) and one main summit—Mount Whitney, the tallest peak within the decrease 48 states.
It’s not my first time mountain climbing, however it’s my first time happening a bunch journey like this. I’ve all the time been extra of a solo strategist than a bunch mission sort of individual, however mountain climbing the John Muir Path intimidated me tremendously. It additionally requires extra planning than I’m naturally inclined for, so when the chance got here, I couldn’t cross it up.
Is coaching sufficient?
I signed up for a gymnasium membership and have a coaching plan, however my ideas drift between which path runners to pack and whether or not I’m out of my depth. Typically, I wish to take issues straightforward, trusting I’ll determine it out when the second comes. However this time, the margin for error feels narrower. Of their welcome e-mail, Wildland Trekking ominously said that this was one of many hardest journeys they provide. And it wasn’t simply that I needed to prepare for myself. I needed to prepare to verify I may sustain with the remainder of the group.
That’s one thing Abbey, our group chief (path identify: “Dirtnap”), reminded us of on our first name. “You’re not coaching for your self,” she mentioned. “You’re coaching for the individual subsequent to you.” She emphasised that as a path household, we weren’t simply answerable for ourselves however for one another. Coaching correctly earlier than our journey meant we’d all benefit from the journey extra.
I maintain turning that over in my thoughts.
Throughout that very same name, we went round and launched ourselves. One hiker talked about she’s nice at staying optimistic when others really feel down. One other chimed in with an identical present. I bit my lip. What do I deliver moreover a good sense of course and a nasty angle towards blisters? Once I’m in a nasty temper, I’d slightly nurse it alone than be the cheerleader at mile 16 in pouring rain.
I’m nervous. Not simply concerning the weight of my pack—35 to 45 kilos, in accordance with Wildland’s prep e-mail—however about what it means to hitch a “path household” I didn’t select. There’s part of me that resists the predetermined closeness of a bunch journey.
However this stress between compelled proximity and real connection isn’t distinctive. It seems that shared hardship actually does deliver individuals nearer.
In 2021, 12% of U.S. adults mentioned they’d no shut buddies, quadrupling from simply 3% in 1990, in accordance with the American Survey Middle. When forming friendships feels tougher than ever, perhaps sharing miles—and the inevitable struggles that come together with that—provides a special form of shortcut. I feel it’s additionally a part of why extra vacationers are turning to guided group adventures. In a world the place loneliness charges have surged, structured discomfort provides a uncommon likelihood to forge actual connection. It’s like summer time camp, however for adults.
In fact, proximity doesn’t assure friendship. It solely creates the chance. The remaining is as much as us. And that’s the place I falter. I’ve achieved sufficient solo adventures to understand how properly I can present up for myself. When occasions are powerful, it’s straightforward to retreat inward, to guard my vitality. This journey leaves no choice to ghost the dinner circle or faux I didn’t hear somebody ask how my day was. I’ll want to indicate up repeatedly for individuals I don’t but know. It requires belief, empathy and a willingness to see and be seen.
Proper now, I don’t have the solutions. I haven’t began the exhausting half. I’ve solely simply began coaching (taking a look at you, inclines on the treadmill). However, I haven’t spent an evening sweating in my sleeping bag or laying out laughing after a day alpine swim.
The advantages of bodily difficult your self
However there’s excellent news. If it really works, issues may really really feel simpler. Analysis means that once we face bodily challenges, assist makes the load really feel lighter—actually. In a single examine from the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, contributors who stood on the base of a steep hill with a pal perceived the hill as much less steep than those that had been alone. Merely serious about a supportive pal had an identical impact.
Perhaps that’s the actual summit: not simply getting up the mountain, however studying the way to share the climb. Within the course of, I’m hoping to be taught whether or not I can actually present up for a bunch—emotionally and bodily—in methods I often save for myself.
Picture by nd3000/iStock.com
